Monday, May 12, 2008
12:39 PM
Bleeding..
Here comes a whole lot shit of whining that you've not seen for a long time.
After sometime when we all think about it, different people have different problems in their head to think about. Yet again, if you bother to brainstorm a bit only certain problems can be solved. As for some, you have to live with it. This is reality.
While walking down the street have you ever thought that reality is really very mean. That reality makes you cry once in a while or rather almost everytime.
Or put it in a way that is more of a "MANLY" term Reality STRESSES you up every now and then. We never bother to think about all this because we keep thinking that all this comes naturally with a flow. No one realises its yours to call.
The bubbly boy with a good smile and very humble look has his own problems too. Who knows he gets really frighten toi lose the people around him. To keep harping on that thought a million times till people can't be bothered to listen to his whinings. Being afraid that his loved ones are not okay and stuffs. You may never know isn't it ..
Everyone says " If you're down, i'll be there for you.. " Thing is, will you be ? Are you willing to be ? Better still, Are you even bothered? Then these promises are left said and undone at the end of time. When i'm really down i always look upon the people i love around me. But what if i'm down about the people i love around me ? Do i get to look up upon them ? I can't.. Cos somehow it'd hurt them.. Sometimes, even knowing that you're really fragile and you care too much and too deep for someone, you still can't change that factor that's in you.. This is because it just lives in you.. Doesn't it ?
I know of this someone. Let's name this person John.
John is a really nice person. He takes care of me. Makes me feel loved and stuffs. Thing is, i wanna step out of his life slowly because i am afraid that one day he'd leave me. So, if i slowly step out, it'd seem like a naturally flowed thing you know. Oh well, it hurts. Very much. But i do have to go through this portion of pain to make sure that i don't face so much more of it in future. I'd rather be at the foundation of the moutain pushing him to the peak of the mountain and let him forget me later on than me being at the peak of the mountain together with him and him forgetting me.. Don't get this theory huh ? Read it again, and again till you get it..
It might be over and done but the heart ache lives on inside. If only you can tell or show people how much they mean to you. But the whole fact here is that, expressing this kind of things doesn't come in words..
"Reflections on the water, i share with you on my blank paper.
call out your name as if i don't know you or i've had you replaced.
Were you real and were you here
What is this feeling that i fear
Open up and make things clear
Do you love me ?
Screaming out loud wont help but it makes me feel better
Nothing compares to this
Why are we still here shouldnt we have moved
but still we stay
i cannot be with you
let me go..
The scars upon your head pierce through my soul yet i can't love you
the way that you love me why can't you see that like this we wont last
trust me we will be just fine
let go of these feelings you feel inside
i know in just a matter of time
we'll be fine..."
I hope you got what i mean.. I have my reasons to it..
In time to come, more updates...